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Not Feeling Inspired?

by EvieBurke, posted in inspiration

I was thinking about the post with WheezyWaiter’s video talking about inspiration.

“If you want to create something and you’re not feeling inspired, take a closer look as to why that is or just ignore it and start doing stuff” – Craig Benzine

This came up because I was having a hard time coming up with a topic for this post. I couldn’t think of anything to write about and wanted to move on to something else. Basically, I wasn’t feeling inspired.

I remembered feeling similarly when I was a programmer/developer. There was a specific task or program I needed to work on, but I really didn’t want to, I wanted to find anything else to do but that task or program. I felt like if I tackled it while I was feeling like this it would take twice as long to complete than if I waited until I felt like it.

I realized that the thought or feeling is the same even though I would have never said that I didn’t feel inspired. Telling your boss or client that you weren’t inspired to work on something just wasn’t an option. So, why is it different when it comes to something like writing? It doesn’t have to be. As Craig said, “just ignore it and start doing stuff.”

There are a couple other similarities between the two for me: the distractions. Because I wasn’t inspired to work something, I would take a break every 15 minutes and do something else. Things like a quick check of my work and personal email or Facebook or Twitter. The problem was that I wasn’t really giving myself a chance to really become involved in what I was working on. When I stopped allowing myself to be distracted I would generally become pretty involved with whatever I was working on after a little bit.

I still occasionally find myself doing this. The difference is I recognize it a lot sooner now. One way I combat this is a timer. I set the timer for however long I want to commit to working on the task without distractions and then do it! I find it also helps to close any windows or browser tabs that might be distracting.

When you’re not inspired and are allowing yourself to be distracted, what do you do?

Somethings Missing

by EvieBurke, posted in quick

Most every blog post you’ll come across here has something to do with changes or ideas, big or small, that you can use. Don’t get me wrong, it’s all great advice (I’ll admit I’m a bit biased).  I also feel like there’s something else to say though, that there’s something missing. And that’s: You’re OK exactly where you are. You’re not broken. You don’t need to be fixed. If you want to make changes, great! Find the tools, resources and people to help you. Just remember you’re not broken and you never were.

What Would Make You Happy?

by EvieBurke, posted in Being Happy, Happiness

Happy PuppyWhat would give you the most happiness right now?

Is it something that you can do right now? Well, why aren’t you doing it?

Is it something you can do later today? Yes? Then make plans to do it! Wait, you’re saying your day is filled – you simply don’t have time today, or even tomorrow to do it. Really? Are you sure? Are you putting yourself last on the priority list?

Or is it something that you won’t be able to do for quite a while – something you need to save for or wait for?

I ask because too often we answer questions like “what would give you the most happiness right now?” with things we can’t accomplish in a day or even over the course of a week. Or we answer with things we can’t control at all. Sometimes we answer with “I’d be happy right now if:”

  1. I weighed 20 pounds less
  2. I wasn’t in debt
  3. my boss was more understanding
  4. gas was less expensive
  5. it was less humid and 80 degrees out
  6. I was on vacation somewhere

Let’s take a look at these responses.

I’d be happy if I weighed 20 pounds less or I wasn’t in debt.

Items one and two are goals you have some control over, but you can’t achieve those goals in one day or a week. If your goal is like one of these two you can approach it a couple of ways:

  1. What small step can I do this week that will take me closer to that goal? For example, you could find out which gyms are close to you and what their hours and fees are, or create a budget with a debt plan.
  2. Who do I get to be when I reach that goal? How do I feel? What small thing can I do this week to be closer to that? What other things can I do to feel that way? Maybe at the lower weight you aren’t ashamed of your body – how does that show up in your day? Do you avoid certain activities? Maybe you can create a mantra and attend one of those activities this week.

I’d be happy if my boss was more understanding, or gas was less expensive, or it was less humid and 80 degrees out.

Items three, four and five are goals that you have no control over. You can’t control your boss, gas prices or the weather no matter how hard you try or how much you wish you could. In these situations:

  1. How can I behave differently in those situations so I am happier? Maybe you can take a deep breath and decide not to get upset with your boss, find a way to drive less so you don’t have to get gas as often, or find activities that you can enjoy in the current weather.
  2. What can I be grateful for in this situation? Perhaps you’re grateful that your boss is a wonderful problem solver, that there is gas available (or maybe you get good gas mileage), or that the sun is out.

I’d be happy if I was on vacation somewhere.

If you said something like item five then you’re probably not taking enough, if any, time for yourself in a normal week. We all need to recharge our batteries and take time for ourselves. It’s not selfish and our families will survive without us (yes, you might need a babysitter) – oh, and our coworkers or clients will be OK too. Take some time this week to do something that recharges your batteries. Maybe that’s a walk by yourself, lunch with a friend, a movie (alone or with a friend) or whatever it is that gives you some time to relax and take care of yourself.

So, what would give you the most happiness right now?

Photo credit: Happy Puppy! by B Rosen via flickr

Should Do and Want To, but Won’t

by EvieBurke, posted in comfort zone, Intuition, planning

Man ThinkingHave you ever been in a situation where you felt you should do something, but maybe you didn’t really want to? Or the reverse, where you felt you shouldn’t do something, but you really did want to?

Wanting to do something feels a lot better than feeling like we should do something. When I read a book I want to read, I get a lot more out of the experience and generally enjoy it more. When I read a book I feel I should read, it takes a really long time for me to read and I don’t enjoy the book as much. That experience between want’s and should’s is pretty universal.

How about when you don’t want to do something? If you don’t want to do something and you do anyway you won’t get as much out of the experience, right? Well, yes and no. There are a lot of things that I don’t want to do (on some level) that I do anyway because the reason I don’t want to do it is that it’s outside of my comfort zone (for more on that read this post).

I recently found myself with an opportunity to do something that I felt I should do and I wanted to do it, but I had little energy for it (I was tired just thinking about it). I reviewed my energy for this opportunity from many different angles. Was it outside my comfort zone somehow? Was I being fueled by rivalry? Was I trying to prove something to someone? Was I worried about what other people would think?

I finally decided to sit down and prepare for this opportunity. The words wouldn’t come. I sat for a while and had many feelings that I wanted to convey, but no words to express them.

That’s when I quieted myself and listened to my gut (or intuition). I learned that I wasn’t ready for this opportunity at this time. That’s why I had low energy for it. And I realized that while this specific opportunity would never be available again, I can share with a portion of that audience in other ways in the future, when I am ready and there is energy for it.

When you find yourself in a place where the should’s and want to’s meet, but have no energy or enthusiasm for the task don’t forget to check your gut or intuition. What does that say you should do?

Photo credit: Thinking RFID by @boetter via flickr

How Do I Check My Intuition?

by EvieBurke, posted in Intuition

Peace by kudumomoHave an important decision to make? Check your intuition!

Need to know what you should do next? What does your intuition say about it?

You hear people say to trust your intuition, but how do you know what your intuition is telling you about that decision?

One way to tap into your intuition to help you make decisions is to think about two situations:

Situation 1: Think about a person, place, thing, or situation that made (or makes) you feel completely engaged, happy or at home. Think about what you felt emotionally, physically and mentally.

Situation 2: Think about a person, place or thing that made (or makes) you feel completely out of your element and uncomfortable. Think about what you felt emotionally, physically and mentally.

Now, think about the decision you want to make. If you decide yes, how does it feel? Does it feel more like situation 1 or situation 2? If you decide no, how does it feel?

For example, let’s say you want to determine if you should go to an event or not. When you think about going to the event, does it feel more like situation 1 or 2? I can usually tell by the feeling in my stomach or back. The feeling in both places is different for each situation.

How do you tap into your intuition to make decisions?

A couple of things to point out:

  • The above technique is very similar to Martha Beck’s “Shackles Off/On” technique in her book “Steering By Starlight.”
  • If you want some additional ways to tap into your intuition check out this post on Angela Artemis’ blog Powered by Intuition.
Photo credit: Peace by kudumomo via flickr