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The currency of real networking is not greed but generosity. - Keith Ferrazzi

The real purpose of meeting people for coffee

This is the fourth installment of the 8 easy-to-make networking mistakes that can be avoided series.

This week I’m going over two mistakes:

  1. I assumed coffee meetings were only for selling your service/product.
  2. I didn’t do follow-up calls with people I met or set up coffee meetings.

Because I assumed that meeting people for coffee was only for selling your service or product, that was the energy I put out there. Part of that was because I really did want people to meet with me to find out more about what I did and then buy from me.

The result was, aside from Robin (who knew how to network, offered great advice and referred me to my current accountant), 90% of the coffee meetings I went to were people doing their sales pitch. I rationalized that it was okay because I expected it.

And because I was primarily meeting with only people who wanted me to buy their things, calling them later or having another coffee meeting never even crossed my mind. After all, I still wasn’t interested in their service or product (remember I thought coffee meetings were to sell your service/product).

Unfortunately, there are many people out there who have been networking for years and believe that coffee meetings and follow-up phone calls ARE only about selling your service/product.

And some of them have built fairly successful businesses doing that. Here’s what I’ve noticed though, they constantly have to find new places to network.

Why? Because they get the reputation of being that guy who just wants to sell you their stuff. Then their potential for sales quickly plummets and they have to find somewhere else to network where they don’t have that reputation or encourages that kind of thing.

I don’t know about you, but that method of sales seems completely exhausting to me. Seriously, I’d rather get another job working for someone else – I’d feel less icky at the end of the day.

So, what’s the alternative look like?

The real purpose of meeting people for coffee is:

  • Getting to know the other person and their business
  • Discovering who their ideal client is
  • Finding out what resources they might need

The currency of real networking is not greed but generosity. - Keith FerrazziBasically, the purpose of coffee meetings are to build business relationships, friendships even.

And you do that by being curious about the other person. Who do they serve, why do they serve them? What do they like about what they do?

You continue to build that relationship by doing follow-up calls and coffee meetings later. Discover what new things are happening for them and their business. Learn if something has changed.

Your business relationships are built by continuing the conversation over time, just like any other relationship.

I invite you to share something a little different – share what your best coffee meeting was and why it was the best. If you don’t have an example that springs to mind, share what you think it would look like in the comments below!

Question of the Fortnight #11

What is the funniest networking experience you’ve ever had?Question of the Fortnight

Share your answer in the comments below!

What is a fortnight? It’s 14 days or 2 weeks.

What is “Question of the Fortnight?” Every other week I’ll ask a question here on the blog. Through out the two weeks I’ll update the blog post with some of your answers. These will be from the comments below, from people I see networking and any other way I happen to receive your answer to the question.

The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake - you can't learn anything from being perfect. - Adam Osborne

The most valuable thing

This is the third installment of the 8 easy-to-make networking mistakes that can be avoided series. This week’s mistake is: I didn’t know what I didn’t know, so much so that I didn’t have a clue what to ask my coach for help with.

My coach had built a successful business, in large part to her networking and follow-up.

And she had faced many of the same problems and frustrations as I was facing.

However, all her knowledge and experience couldn’t help me when I didn’t know what to ask.

I listed “I didn’t know what I didn’t know” as a mistake, but actually it’s not a mistake as much as it is part of the learning process.

It’s something to be expected and even celebrated (if you wait until you’re sure you have no blind spots, aka perfection, you’ll never start).

If I had realized how many mistakes I was making, I probably would have gone and hid under the covers.

The only mistake here is NOT taking the opportunity to learn from your mistakes when you realize you made them. Don’t worry about them or beat yourself up, just learn from them and move on.

And I’m thankful that I did have a coach who was able to help me be as prepared as I was. I’d have many more “mistakes” to share without her support and guidance (regardless of the questions I didn’t know to ask).

The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake - you can't learn anything from being perfect. - Adam OsborneSo, there are two lessons here:

  1. Recognize that you’re going to make mistakes AND that is OKAY.
  2. Have a coach to support you and help you be prepared.

Share some of the things you didn’t know you didn’t know about business or networking in the comments below!

Question of the Fortnight #10

What is your favorite thing about networking?Question of the Fortnight

Share your answer in the comments below!

What is a fortnight? It’s 14 days or 2 weeks.

What is “Question of the Fortnight?” Every other week I’ll ask a question here on the blog. Through out the two weeks I’ll update the blog post with some of your answers. These will be from the comments below, from people I see networking and any other way I happen to receive your answer to the question.

How to become clear and consistent when networking

This is the second installment of the 8 easy-to-make networking mistakes that can be avoided series.

I’m going over two mistakes this week:

  1. I wasn’t comfortable talking about myself, and I wasn’t prepared to share with others what I do.
  2. I was only clear on what I used to do in my former job.

One part of this is I wanted to make sure I was including as many people as I could in my description of my ideal client.

This is a common problem. One of the best examples of this is someone who sells makeup saying that their ideal client is someone with skin.

So, my husband is your ideal client? And so is my 20 year old nephew? And my mom, oh AND my 8 year old cousin?

Well, that’s confusing. And if I approached any of them saying, “hey I just met someone that works with people just like you, people with skin!” They probably wouldn’t be interested.

Be specific about who you help.

Instead of saying that your ideal client is someone with skin, you might say, “I work with women who want to look 10 years younger” or “I help prevent and reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles.”

It’s much more specific and now I know that my husband is NOT your ideal client (he really doesn’t care about either of those things).

Be clear and consistent.

Remember how I wrote that I got a referral for my old company? My old job was the only thing I was really comfortable talking about, when I talked about them I was clear and consistent, even when the wording changed. After all, I had worked there for almost 10 years!

I knew exactly what they did and how they helped people. I spoke with a confidence and authority I didn’t have when I talked about my own business.

Yes, some of that confidence comes with time, but you can help it along with some preparation.

How do you become clear and consistent?

Make a list of the results your clients get, both the tangible results (more clients, clearer skin, etc) and the intangible (confidence).

And practice how you talk about what you do. Work with your business coach on this. They’ll have a different perspective than friends and family (who mean well, but might not understand networking as an entrepreneur).

What has most helped you or would most help you be clear and consistent? Share in the comments below.