What’s your first step this week?
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Re-set your intention
Have you ever prepared for something, planned it out and got everything done that you could in advance and then something goes wrong?
Did it throw you into a tizzy?
Maybe you felt like all the hard work you did was for nothing?
Well, I had an experience that could have easily gone like that this week.
And I followed my own advice (it’s also the advice of every coach that I’ve ever worked with or known).
What was the advice? Set an intention. And re-set that intention as often as necessary.
On Thursday I hosted a workshop. I had most everything set up, just a couple of things to do that morning. Well, early Thursday morning the room was reset (I forgot to leave a note to leave it as it was) and this threw me into a bit of a tizzy.
Thankfully my friend and fellow business owner Mary was helping me and was there even before I was (Mary jumped right in and had some of the room reset even before I got there).
People pitched in and we got the room set up (my husband joined us for this and some of the workshop participants chipped in too!).
Now, this was not the environment I envisioned and intended for the workshop! Walking into a room being put together, helping set chairs and there’s no coffee made or snacks out yet!
I was a bit frazzled. I was in GET IT DONE mode. And then I remembered my intention (which was not what I was feeling).
I went to a room I could be alone for a few minutes, centered myself and set my intention again.
I share this because how often do we have this experience in other parts of our lives?
You’re going to go to a networking group (or to do something else) and then the kids really don’t want to get out of bed or argue with you every step of the way to getting them to school.
Or the map app on your phone crashes.
Or traffic is bad.
Or you spill coffee down your shirt.
Or something else happens that makes you go AHHH! not today!
And you walk into that group feeling frustrated, upset or maybe just unsettled.
When your intention was to to be confident and approachable.
THIS is when it’s time to re-set your intention.
Whether it’s an extra 2 minutes in the car or a quick trip to the bathroom or even just sitting down by yourself for a moment – you can set your intention again, just by remembering it AND taking some time to feel it.
This takes practice, sometimes you’ll remember to re-set in the car on the way home from the event, sometimes you’ll remember halfway through and eventually you’ll consistently remember to do it before you walk in.
If you could go back, when is a time you would want to re-set your intention? How would you have done it? Share below.
What did you observe?
In January I shared a story of a woman who walked into a networking event and didn’t find what she expected.The following weeks we looked at different aspects of that story. You can read it here, here, here and here.
This week let’s look at something a little different with these stories. Before we start, I encourage you to review the stories again and note what you think of:
- woman who left
- the two women remaining
- me (telling the story)
- yourself as you read the story.
What do you find yourself thinking about those four different aspects of the story?
Sometimes we can learn more from our reactions to the stories we hear than from the actual story itself.
So, review your thoughts and feelings of the various parts of the story.
What images come up?
What do you observe about yourself?
Share below.
Missed opportunities
A couple of weeks ago I shared a story about a woman attending a new networking group, it not being quite what she expected and her leaving. You can read it here.
This week let’s go over the third and last question: Were there any missed opportunities here?
Well, yes, yes there were! Many actually.
Let’s start with perhaps the less obvious missed opportunity. The one by the two women who regularly attend that group.
There was one thing that the person in charge could have done to more immediately make guests feel at ease: make sure the hostess knew they were there!
It’s a small thing, but it might have helped put their visitor a little more at ease.
The other missed opportunity was the conversation they all could have had if she stayed 15 to 30 minutes longer.
She shared about herself, her business, and that she was new to the area.
And she got to know a bit about the other women and their businesses.
But had she stayed longer she might have learned about the other groups in the area that she should check out – the ones where they regularly have a larger number of attendants.
She had already determined that the ladies there weren’t potential clients and from what they shared about their businesses that they weren’t potential referral partners either (this is a plus, because she clearly knows how to identify both!), however, she didn’t share who are great referral partners for her.
They might have been able to point her toward some really great connections and potentially introduced her – if they would have been given the opportunity.
So, there were some missed opportunities on both sides.
What are some of the opportunities that you realized you missed when you thought back on meetings or events? What did you do differently so you didn’t miss those opportunities again? Share in the comments below.
First vs lasting impressions
A couple weeks ago I shared a story about a woman attending a new networking group, it not being quite what she expected and her leaving. You can read it here.
This week let’s go over the second question: How do you think this was perceived by the two ladies remaining?
First impressions are an interesting thing, but not the only thing.
After all, the very first impression she made was a good one.
She walked in pleasant and smiling and very clear about what she did and who she served. She came prepared with not only business cards, but a brochure!
She was interested in the other women there and the group. She asked all the questions you’d expect someone new to ask and was conversational.
And then she said she had to leave, I have all those things to do back at the office — I’m so sorry. And left.
The women remaining looked at each other and shrugged after she left — apparently building a business relationship with the two of us wasn’t high on the agenda today…
The first impression was good, but the one they left with — well, I bet she won’t be coming to mind anytime soon for a referral from either of them.
And the lasting impression she left wasn’t probably what she was thinking about as she walked out the door.
Maybe the work on her desk was more important then the lasting impression she left or maybe it wasn’t. Or maybe she got caught up in the conversation in her head and the uncomfortableness she was feeling and found an escape route.
The maybe’s don’t really matter.
The fact is she left, and that wasn’t good or bad — it was an action that she decided to take.
And the remaining ladies reacted also isn’t good or bad — it’s their perception of that action.
The easy thing to do here is suggest you think about how you’ll be perceived before you make any decisions (staying, going or otherwise).
But that won’t server you. You’ll never be able to leave a 100% positive impression on 100% of the people you meet.
And trying to do that will drive you batty and you’ll always be stuck in your head.
Instead before you walk into events, think about how you want to be (set an intention). What do you want to feel (or embody)?
Then, if you’re at a meeting or event that isn’t a good fit, check back with yourself — if I were fully embodying the intention I set, what would that look like? Would I stay or would I go?
Have you ever left a bad impression on someone and was okay with it? Or maybe you didn’t realize it until later? Share in the comments here.