Long-Term vs Short-Term Happiness

Have you ever found yourself avoiding certain topics with people because you didn’t want to cause a problem?  I do this.  I like to avoid confrontation and as a result I avoid certain conversations. So, I sometimes avoid talking about what I need to be happy in a relationship because it might lead to an unpleasant discussion.

I realized I was avoiding a couple of topics with my husband the other night.  I also realized that for my long-term happiness I really needed to discuss those things with him, even though I might not be happy with the results in the short-term.  Thinking about having that discussion scared me to death, but I did it anyway.  Thankfully I found that we really are on the same page on those topics.  It also opened the door for him to talk about some topics he had been avoiding.  We have a better understanding of each other now.

I must have felt like I was on a roll, because later that week I called an old friend out of the blue.  She gave my husband and I a gift a few years ago that had some strings attached.  It sits in a cupboard forgotten most of the time, but when I do think about it, oh man, the knots in the stomach!  I decided to call her and tell her that we couldn’t keep it any longer.  It turned out I had completely misunderstood her intention!  I literally felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders.

I’ve found that the longer I wait to have these discussions the more worked up I get, and even if the discussions don’t go as well as those above, they always go better than I expect. We don’t always give ourselves enough credit.

Where are you sacrificing your long-term happiness for your short-term happiness?  We are a long stronger than we think we are.  It’s important that we have those difficult discussions, especially with those we love the most.