In the middle of what might be a stressful holiday season, don’t forget to take care of yourself in little ways.
Category: Self Care
Two Wolves and Your Business
Have you heard the story of the two wolves that a grandfather tells his grandson? (no, this isn’t a set up for a joke)
If you’re not familiar with the story, here it is:
An old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice, “Let me tell you a story.
I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do.
But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times.”
He continued, “It is as if there are two wolves inside me.
One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him, and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.
But the other wolf, ah! He is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing.
Sometimes, it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”
The boy looked intently into his Grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which one wins, Grandfather?”
The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, “The one I feed.”
As I was thinking about this story I thought about the stories we tell ourselves. When you talk with others about how your day went or how you’re doing, you tell a story. When you’re reviewing how an event or meeting went, you’re telling a story. When you’re thinking about your to-do list or planning your day, you’re telling a story. When you talk about how your business is doing, you’re telling a story.
It’s how we’re all wired. It’s not bad, it’s not good, it just is.
Our stories feed us and that determines which wolf gets fed. Are you telling stories of an angry world full of people out to get you, or are you telling stories of a friendly place where there’s enough for everyone?
And what about the stories other people tell? Do they feed you? Yes, if you let them. It’s like someone serving you dinner. If you don’t like it you can be “polite” and eat it anyway – or not. Is it rude to not eat what’s in front of you? Well, if you have a peanut allergy and someone gives you food with peanuts in it, is it rude to not eat it? No, it’s not. Determining whose stories you listen to is similar. It’s okay to say “I don’t agree” or find another conversation.
So, for your business – what are you feeding it? What stories do you tell yourself and others about it? And are those the stories that you want to feed your business?
And what stories are you letting other people feed you and your business? Where do you find yourself agreeing with someone without thinking about it?
Share in the comments below!
How to Prepare Your Business for Your Vacation
It’s almost June! Which means schools are finishing up (if they haven’t already) and summer is practically here (regardless of what the weather might try to tell us). And with warmer weather and longer days comes the desire of a few days off, or even a vacation (!) to enjoy the weather and sun and have some time to relax.
Sounds wonderful right? But then you start to think about all those things that you want to or should be doing for your business right now – and suddenly taking any time away from your home office sounds less wonderful and more stressful.
On some level though, you know you need the time away – a time to rest and not think about your business. You just don’t know if that’s possible.
Let’s take a step back and remember having a JOB (play with me here). Remember going on vacation then? If your job was anything like mine, going on vacation meant that you had to set aside some extra time before you left to tie up any loose ends, to let clients and/or co-workers know you’re going to be gone and to update anyone who was going to be handling some of your responsibilities while you were gone (and maybe letting them know how to reach you in an emergency).
You know that that process was? A system, even if you didn’t call it that or think of it that way, it was the system that you, or the business you worked for, setup to make sure that things ran relatively smoothly while you were gone.
Let’s step back to today. What is your system for taking time off in your business?
Okay, I hear some of you laughing (or sighing) that you are your business and if you’re not there things don’t run. Nothing happens when you’re not in the office – or worse, if you’re not in the office things start to fall apart. Well, that might currently be true, but there are probably a few things that you can do before you leave or set up to happen while you’re gone to make sure nothing falls apart and that things run smoothly when you return.
- Let your clients know you’ll be out of the office
Just give them a heads up. This could be a quick phone call and a follow-up email so they have the dates and other information at their fingertips. And let if you’re in a business where emergencies happen and they might need you now. Let them know how to handle that. - Tie up loose ends
If you have any projects or communications that have under 15 minutes left on them, finish those up. These things will take longer to do if you wait until you return, because they won’t be fresh in your mind. - Decide what can wait until after you get back
If you’re anything like me you’ve suddenly decided that those two bigger projects that you put on the back burner should really be DONE before you leave. Because you don’t want to think about it when you return. You want to have time available for those great new ideas that will pop up when you return from vacation.This is where I remind us both (you and me) that some things will have to wait until after vacation. Trying to cram too much in before you leave will result in frustration and the temptation to take work with you on vacation (don’t do it!).Instead, decide ahead of time what can wait. Make a list if you need to and then you can schedule those things when you return. - Out of Office email reply
Most email programs have this. Set it up for the dates that you’ll be gone and let them know when they can expect a reply back from you. - Update your voice mail message
Again, let people know you’re out and when you’ll get back to them. - Set time aside for replies and phone calls when you return
Set aside a couple hours on your first day back in the office for returning emails and phone calls (and cleaning out your inbox). - Plan the first couple days you’re back in the office
This one is really important for me. Last year I didn’t do this when I went on a two week vacation. Actually, I “planned” on planning my first week back on the airplane ride home. Yeah, so on the airplane ride home I think I slept, talked with my husband and maybe read a couple of chapters of a fiction book. So, my first week back “in the office” I did catch up on email and send my newsletter, but that was about it…I realized that first week back would have been a lot smoother, and more productive, if I would have planned a few tasks to be completed that week. I could have gotten back into the swing of things a lot faster. - Write and schedule your newsletter in advance
If you send a newsletter, you can write it in advance and schedule it to go out while you’re gone. And if you have a VA you can write everything in advance and pass it along to her early. - Enjoy your time off!
Allow yourself to mentally unplug from your business and enjoy your time off!
You deserve some time off! Put it on your schedule and start planning for it!
In the comments below share what else you do to prepare for vacation or even a day away from your business.
Image courtesy of Mary Wu at marywuva.com
Things To Do, Low Motivation and 3 Questions
Ever had a day where you just wanted to sit in front of the TV or maybe curl up with a good book or take a nap? It’s not that you didn’t have things to do; it’s just that you didn’t feel motivated to do them.
These days happen to everyone. You can push through it, give in to it or take a look at why it’s happening.
Here are some questions to ask yourself when you’re in this situation:
- Am I getting enough sleep?
Many times low motivation is a result of too many late nights. Your body needs sleep to recharge. Try to get at least 7 hours, preferably more, of sleep tonight. - What am I avoiding?
Is there something that you’re avoiding? Another way to word this is: what am I afraid of happening if I complete this? Sometimes you have to dig a bit to figure out why you’re avoiding something. - Do I have enough down time?
If you’re always busy, whether business or family, you’ll wear yourself out. Your body and mind might decide that a day off is exactly what you need.
Go through and answer each question – especially if you’re not getting enough sleep. Why? Well, why aren’t you getting enough sleep? Answer the other two questions. Sometimes I find that I (or a client) am not getting enough sleep because I’m avoiding something or I’m taking some well-deserved downtime and missing out on the sleep.
For example, several years ago I had a job that I did not enjoy, at all. I regularly stayed up late and then got up early for work. I kept telling myself to go to bed earlier, but I didn’t. One night I realized I was staying up late because when you fall asleep, it feels like a few minutes later when you wake up. So, by staying up later, I was delaying going to work the next morning (ok, logically it might not make sense, but we don’t always do things logically).
So, I was staying up late to avoid work. Thankfully, that spurred some changes in my life at that time. Now, you might not be avoiding work. Instead you might be avoiding a particular task, a meeting or conversation or something else.
Once you know why your motivation is low, decide how you’re going to address it (what changes will it spur in your life). Meaning – if you’re not getting enough sleep, what can you do to make sure you get to bed earlier tonight? Basically, what’s your plan of action to avoid having this issue tomorrow?
But what do you do about today’s motivation low? Well, the plan of action might have given you some motivation, which is great! But it’s okay if that didn’t happen too. When your motivation is still low you have a couple of options left: push through it or take a break. Trust your intuition (or gut feeling) and decide what the best course of action is for you. It’s okay to decide to take a break. Sometimes that’s the most productive thing you can do.
What do you do when your motivation is low?
What Are You Feeding Your Business?
The other week I heard the story of the two wolves again. I love hearing these types of stories. I always hear or understand something new each time I hear them. If you’re not familiar with the story, here it is:
An old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice, “Let me tell you a story.
I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do.
But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times.”
He continued, “It is as if there are two wolves inside me.
One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him, and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.
But the other wolf, ah! He is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing.
Sometimes, it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”
The boy looked intently into his Grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which one wins, Grandfather?”
The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, “The one I feed.”
As I was thinking about this story I thought about the stories we tell ourselves. When you talk with others about how your day went or how you’re doing, you tell a story. When you’re reviewing how an event or meeting went, you’re telling a story. When you’re thinking about your to-do list or planning your day, you’re telling a story. When you talk about how your business is doing, you’re telling a story.
It’s how we’re all wired. It’s not bad, it’s not good, it just is.
Our stories feed us and that determines which wolf gets fed. Are you telling stories of an angry world full of people out to get you, or are you telling stories of a friendly place where there’s enough for everyone?
And what about the stories other people tell? Do they feed you? Yes, if you let them. It’s like someone serving you dinner. If you don’t like it you can be “polite” and eat it anyway – or not. Is it rude to not eat what’s in front of you? Well, if you have a peanut allergy and someone gives you food with peanuts in it, is it rude to not eat it? No, it’s not. Determining whose stories you listen to is similar. It’s okay to say “I don’t agree” or find another conversation.
So, for your business – what are you feeding it? What stories do you tell yourself and others about it? And are those the stories that you want to feed your business?
And what stories are you letting other people feed you and your business? Where do you find yourself agreeing with someone without thinking about it?